Tuesday: Why checking in “just because” matters in media and PR relationships,
PS: Grab my Valentine's Day gift guide webinar recording now - for free! - as my gift to you!
Good morning!
I wanted to start today by sharing a few photos from lovely dinners I’ve had with new PR friends over the past week or so, as they illustrate a greater point I’m hoping to make in today’s email.
In media and PR networking, how you show up when you don’t need anything often matters more than how you show up when you do. That’s where the difference between transactional and mutual relationships becomes clear—and why journalists can usually tell which camp a publicist falls into very quickly.
This is why checking in “just because” matters. When you reach out without a pitch, ask, or deadline attached, it becomes more about the relationship—not just the outcome.
Why does this matter? It matters because it matters in all types of relationships, and this is a relationship that needs to be treated as such. It says: I see you as a person, not just an outlet. I value your work beyond what it can do for my client. I’m thinking long-term, not one story at a time.
In my writer friend circles, we can all tell stories of people who disappeared from our inbox (and our lives) the second we became less useful to them. And those people often reappear once we are, again, useful. It’s transparent as a mirror, you guys.
In an industry where inboxes are dominated by asks, a thoughtful, no-strings check-in stands out. And it’s so easy to do. Just be a person. Maybe try congratulating them on a a new beat or outlet, perhaps they just got a new puppy or got to the other side of some big household drama they had been sharing. Or maybe try sharing that you enjoyed a recent story (without tying it to a pitch) or sending a brief “hope you’re doing well” note.
These touches may take seconds out of your day, and they will ultimately build familiarity and trust, even when there’s no immediate payoff.
We’ve all been in transactional relationships, PR and otherwise. They are generally built around one question: What can you do for me right now?
In this relationship, you’ll see certain hallmarks: Outreach only happens when there’s a pitch to place, silence once coverage runs (or doesn’t), follow-ups that focus on needs, not dialogue, and relationships reset every time a new client or campaign begins.
We’ll notice when we’re being contacted only when useful, or feeling interchangeable with any other outlet (let me tell you about how often someone will read something in one of my friend’s Substacks and think it’s something I said because they just consider us interchangeable!), or being forgotten the moment coverage is secured
Some of my best friends are publicists, and it all started with them pitching me and us slowly building a foundation from there. Now, we are in a place where we have a mutual relationship is built on shared respect, curiosity, and professional generosity.
Now, I’m not saying you need to become besties with your whole inbox. I am very lucky that I have developed cherished friendships this way. But I do think it’s important and to have mutual relationships in your inbox. This is where communication happens both with and without an ask and value flows both ways (ideas, context, sources, feedback), and both sides understand each other’s constraints and goals.
In mutual relationships, you benefit too: Because we’re way more likely to open and respond to your email quickly, and give you honest feedback. This is a relationship that wil survives slow news cycles, missed opportunities, and career changes.
I’m not talking about playing favorites, I’m talking about trust, respect, and credibility.
But keep in mind, to the same point, meaningful check-ins are not disguised pitches, not “circling back” emails with no substance, not frequent or forced. It’s not about volume, it’s about authenticity!
Play the long game: The strongest media relationships are built between the pitches—not during them.
Job Leads!
Have a job lead to share? I’m happy to share them, and this newsletter goes out for free daily to over 10,000 media professionals! Email me at alywalansky@gmail.com if you have anything to share.
Foxglove Communications is seeking an earnest and hardworking Account Supervisor or Account Director to join their team in New York. Foxglove is a communications consultancy with expertise in brand strategy, PR, and marketing. Foxglove was founded by Gia Vecchio, a strategist and storyteller with over a decade of experience across hospitality, travel, beverage, and fashion brands that range from savvy startups to global, household names. In this position, you’ll work closely alongside Account Coordinators, Account Executives, Account Supervisors/Directors, and Vice Presidents on a rapidly growing list of acclaimed hospitality clients that span hotels, bars, restaurants, spirits brands, and culinary events across the country. The ideal hire excels at consistently providing thoughtful communication in a fast-paced, autonomous environment. Those who enjoy a small-company feel and who are drawn to a service-based and hospitality-driven culture should apply.
Upcoming travel
I’ll be in Miami for SOBEWFF next month. If you’ll be there too, please let me know so I can say hi!
I’m also going to be in Charleston in early March for their Wine + Food festival. Keep in touch if you’ll be there, too!
Book your consulting session!
I still have some space available going into Q1 2026!
I can join your team on Zoom, a phone call, or in-person and do a team Q&A and answer any of your questions about planning events, mailers, trips, pitching, followups, etc — giving you a very necessary media perspective. Email me at alywalansky@gmail.com if you are interested in chatting more and setting something up :)
We can switch it up in any way you or your team needs. While most of my calls do end up being virtual, I just did one where we did our session over a martini lunch! I’m available for whatever your team prefers. Lets chat.
I’m now contributing to the Yahoo Creators platform, writing a wide range of lifestyles topics: check out my author profile to see some of my most recent pieces! (This is updated daily - usually multiple times daily - so you’ll want to keep checking it out for new content!)
Limited-time deal on ad placement!
I’m offering a seasonal special on advertising in this newsletter. I’d love to place your sponsored posts and advertising in this Substack, which goes out to more than 10,000 media professionals every single day.
Note: I do limit advertising to only what would be of interest to my readers, but am open to both short paragraph blurbs and dedicated posts - if you are interested in chatting details and scheduling something, please email me at alywalansky@gmail.com today!
Tools of the trade
I partnered with Pitchcraft to be able to share a special offer just for my readers: Use code ALY200: new users will get $200 off their first month of the monthly PR Membership or code ALY400: This one offers new users $400 off their first year of the annual PR Membership. This is a great network to join because it’s a community of both PR professionals and journalists working together to find better ways to work together and share opportunities, and you know how much I believe in all of that
Exciting news from our friend Sarah Karger (who you’ve seen as the star expert panelist for several of our gift guide pitching workshops!) - she launched her new course, Affiliate Marketing & Performance-Based PR for Publicists - It’s built specifically to help PR pros and agencies add affiliate management as a core capability, something we all know is completely essential in today’s media landscape.
Grab the Valentine’s Day gift guide pitching webinar best practices webinar — for free!
Now available is our brand-new just released Valentine’s Day gift guide pitching webinar recording — grab that one right here.
Newly published or freshly updated
Since people are often asking about the status of stories from a while ago, and I only share stories in this newsletter that were published or updated in the current week, I have created a list of my author pages at various publications to which I contribute. Bookmark it and make your life a bit easier.
Yahoo Creators: Check out my author profile (I have several new stories a day across the lifestyles umbrella, so that’s the best way to stay updated!)
Southern Living: We Asked Southern Chefs For The Best Thing They Ate This Year—Here’s What They Said
Forbes.com: 17 Fiery Drinks And Dishes To Try In Honor Of Hot & Spicy Food Day
Travel & Leisure: Matching Sets Are My Secret to Staying Cozy on Long-haul Flights—Here Are 14 I’m Eyeing for Winter, From $27
Forbes.com: Cocktails And Dishes To Help You Après-Ski In Style
Travel & Leisure: I’m a Solo Traveler of 25 Years, and These Are the 18 Products I Swear By for Personal Safety in 2026
Travel & Leisure: This Gel Seat Cushion Makes Flights More Comfortable
Southern Living: The 3-Second Rule Is The Easiest Packing Method I’ve Ever Tried
Parade.com: How to Use an Air Fryer (Beginner’s Guide) - Parade
Apartment Therapy: My Packing Trick Helps Me Pack Perfectly Every Time
Travel & Leisure: Traveling Alone Can Be Expensive—Here Are 15 Budget-friendly Hacks That Save Me Money
Southern Living: The One-Pan Cheesy Meal I Make Whenever I'm Too Tired To Cook
If you or your client are featured in any of these stories, I super appreciate any social media shares! Please remember to tag @alywalansky and the outlet.
Here’s what I’m working on:
Be sure to read the below list carefully. Many are stories I posted about yesterday, but some of yesterday's stories are no longer listed and a few new ones have been added since yesterday. This (below) is everything that is still a currently open opportunity as of today.
Please remember when pitching me: Email me at alywalansky@gmail.com - do NOT just hit reply on this newsletter, or there’s a good shot your email will be lost in the heap. Give your email a subject line that makes it clear which story you are pitching me for — it’ll help you in the long run.
Please consult my industry insights guides on submitting expert commentary, sending emails that will catch a journalist’s attention, how to craft pitches journalists will say ‘yes’ to, and the right and wrong way to submit photos, if you need any extra guidance before sending your pitches.
Yahoo Creators
Rounding up some great wellness-oriented items to give your home a refresh as you enter the new year — this may include items that will help you have a more restful sleep, streamline your kitchen, get you organized, and more. I’m also looking for products/services to give yourself a refresh in 2026. This can be everything from meal kits and subscription boxes to wellness items and so forth.
I’m working on several Valentine’s Day gift guides: I’m looking for gifts for him, wellness gifts, gifts for her, pet gifts, food/spirits gifts, and more. To pitch me for these guides, please be sure to include the following:
Name of item
Links to major retailers where sold (it’s in your best interest to include several retailer link options when pitching, especially major ones like Amazon)
Link to image and any necessary credits
Description why it’s a fit
Item must be currently available and currently in stock. Be sure to start a new email thread and be clear in the subject line what specific gift guide(s) you are pitching. Just replying to this email is a great way to get your pitch buried in a heap - we don’t want that! And, yes, in answer to all the questions in my inbox: These are all earned media, and not sponsored, guides.
Before pitching: Please be sure to refer to my photo submission guidelines for help with photo submission best practices!
Forbes
I’m seeking Valentine’s Day themed dishes and drinks.
For all my cocktail/dish pieces, the format for pitching remains:
Name of cocktail
Where served, city, state, URL
LINK to image of the drink and photo credit
description (NOT a recipe) of drink, and quote about drink, with appropriate credit.
Quote about the dish from chef/bartender and please remember to include the name of the person being quoted and their title.
Thanks!
Have a great day, and thanks again for being such an incredible community
<3
aly